Bittersweet Symphony



Me about 30 minutes before the race.



Today I completed the San Antonio Edition of the Rock N Roll Half Marathon. 13.1 miles. And with the amount of other walking today, I'm sure I walked/jogged at least 15 miles. I am absolutely amazed with myself for achieving this accomplishment.

Back in the good old days in grade school, there used to be a thing called the President's Physical Fitness Test (or something like that). They had you do a variety of physical exercises and if you achieved a certain percentile, you were given an away. Things like sit-ups, chin-ups, push-ups and running. They wanted you to run a mile. I always aced every part of that fitness test, except the run. I was a sprinter, and pretty fast at times. I didn't do track in school because I could never run very far, and to me track meant long distance running.

Now look at me, I still didn't run the entire way, but by gosh, I walk/jogged 13.1 miles today. I am so not a runner. And frankly, a little over a year ago I nearly weighed 250 pounds. Heck, 19 months ago I was a pack-a-day smoker, and had been for 18 years. In in summer of 2010 could barely walk a few miles, much less run them. I've come a long way in a year's time. A long way. When I started this back in May, I was barely eight weeks out from my hysterectomy. I had just moved to San Antonio, and I was weak. When I did my pace run, I was so slow. I have managed to keep about the same pace run/walking as I did on my all run at two miles. I really did intend to run the entire time, but when my hip started bothering me at the beginning, then I over used my ankle, causing a sprain in August, I knew I couldn't run the entire way.

I say this was a bittersweet experience. It is partly because I started this journey with a friend. This friend has been down this road a few times and encouraged me to try it. Unfortunately, I ended the journey alone today. I had thought I was going to share it with my run group, but after being told three times how great the park and ride was, I got the hint that I wasn't going to be included in the final race day festivities. I would say it was because they weren't nurturing people, but really just only to each other. I was told I'd find a run buddy and make friends during run club and I would bond with others, but I didn't. I ended up running alone 95% of the time, and I barely spoke to anyone outside of my group. My group took a group picture today, and I didn't see one of them. I cried when I saw the picture. I may be a loner, but not being included still hurts.



I am so happy to have achieved this particular goal. I made it 13.1 miles in a respectable time for a walker/jogger. I will be able to say for the rest of my life that I "ran" a half marathon. However I will always remember that I spent today alone. At least I had others checking on me. Friends are a wonderful thing. I'm not sure what I would do without some of my friends sometimes. At least someone cared that I finished.



My medal for completing the race engraved with my race time
of 3:05:57. Not bad for a first timer with a bad knee and a bum hip.



So today was a bittersweet symphony. It was such a high, but such a low at the same time. I've said it several times today, but I can see me doing 5Ks and maybe an occasional 10K, but I doubt I will do another half-marathon unless I get my hip and knee problems resolved. It is just too painful. Why do the painful thing when there are so many other things I love to do?

"It's a bittersweet symphony, this life."

Goodbye from a Rock N Roll Half Marathon finisher. I made it!!!